Access this guide
Already a member? Login Here
Guide Overview

Sexual Abuse Risk Reduction School Age

Parents will learn crucial strategies to reduce the risk of sexual abuse for their school-aged children, including avoiding sleepovers, teaching body safety rules, and fostering open communication.
March 14, 2023
Summary Notes

- No sleepovers, due to increased risk of abuse by older peers.

- Parents should provide supervision during sleepovers to prevent child-on-child sexual trauma.

- It's important to talk openly and honestly about bodies and privacy.

- Teach children about "creepy feelings" and help them recognize and name them.

- Speak to any adult around your child about sexual abuse prevention.

- Reinforce body safety rules and ask permission before touching others.

- Be honest and scientific when answering questions about how babies are made.

- Encourage open communication with your children about their boundaries and questions.

All right, so let's do now our elementary school students, so from ages like six to 10, somewhere in there, kindergarten through fifth grade, what are we doing to prevent sexual abuse prevention there? Couple of really simple things. No sleepovers. I cannot tell you the number of people who were sexually abused by older peers, so their friend's.

That's a scenario I've heard one too many times. Um, there was unsupervised nighttime dark access and privacy. Uh, your kids may be upset by that or have sleepovers at your house where when it's time for sleeping time, you sleep in the room with those kids to help prevent a child on child sexual trauma experience.

Also, a parent on child. You're giving those parents access to your children as long as you are continuing to have these conversations. Remember that? Mentionable is manageable. That's a Mr. Rogers quote. So at this age, you're wanting to mention and talk about bodies. We don't wanna be afraid to talk about bodies.

We don't. We're gonna react in shameful ways. Your child walks in on you and you're changing. You don't wanna go because the message to them is like, these are unspeakable things, right? It's like, Okay. And they're like, Oh. And you're like, That's my body. No, that's my body. I like a little privacy. I like to change by myself.

But don't overreact, right? Because that's creating a bit of a barrier between you and your. You're wanting them to feel very deeply trusting that you know what you're talking about and that you can handle any conversations around bodies. Remember to teach your children about creepy feelings. This is something I don't do enough.

There is an instinct in us when we can sense that someone is doing something predatorial. Now, a lot of, uh, abusive folks do grooming in such effective ways that you won't feel creeped out until it happens. But there are also people that have this sense of creepiness going on. So what you want to do is you want to notice when your child feels kind of grossed out or creeped out, and start to help them name those things that have an awareness in their bodies.

You also want to continue to speak to any adult who is around your child about your sexual abuse prevention mission. It just. Keens into those predators that, that you're watching and you wanna continue to explicitly direct body safety rules to all the kids that your, your child is interacting with. So you're dropping off a kid at Urban Air.

Hey guys, remember the body safety rules? No hitting, punching, biting, kicking, pushing. We always ask permission to touch other people's bodies if they say no. We respect it and we never, ever, ever touch. Look at share video. Anything related to the parts under our swimsuits. Cause those parts are extra sensitive and can get hurt extra easy.

Cool kids, all right, have fun. They will, they will eventually, you know, start tuning you out like, Yeah mom, you know, But in the event that the thing happens, they are equipped with, Wait, we're not supposed to do that. Why are you doing that? Why are you asking me to do that? That's a no. Right. So you, you're wanting your children to.

Lots of input about the boundaries around their body at this stage, and lots of access to you to ask you whatever question they want. And during this time that kids start to ask questions about how babies are made, be honest, be scientific, be concise, Answer the questions that they have. Don't be awkward.

The more you connect with them around these topics, the more likely they are to come to you when something feels funny or off. Good luck.