So many trauma survivors believe that they "deserved" what happened to them, and therefore don't deserve any of the good things of life. But worthiness is not real. No one "earns" the right to be a human being enjoying their life and the world around them. That's a birthright.
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
In this video, discover the difference between despair tears and grief tears, and how allowing yourself to grieve with caring others can lead to emotional healing and the ability to move forward from trauma and loss.
Supporting a trauma survivor's felt safety means being present with empathy and patience, providing a space of safety to help calm their dysregulation and offer them a secure and grounding attachment relationship.