Natural consequences are great teachers. IF our children have learned to be cued into their bodies signals. (A challenge that takes more time and effort for neurodivergent children with ADHD and Autism in particular).
The skill of interoception is an attachment related skill.
Children learn to make good choices for their bodies by learning to listen to the signals inside of their bodies.
When we punish a child or create more consequences to get them to do something we know is good for them, we are placing their attention away from their bodies, thus delaying the skill and not encouraging it.
Yes, this means being patient and attentive to our children in a world that is very task focused. But is there any other task more important than the task of teaching our children how to listen to and trust their bodies?
Guide and teach instead of punishing and preaching. Your child will feel safe with you and you'll feel less stressed too.
(Also p.s. I don't do this 100 percent of the time. Sometimes I am cranky and grouchy and tired. But I do try to do this most of the time and when I do, it's far more effective)
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In this video, you'll learn why young children may exhibit physical aggression towards others, and why it's important for parents and caregivers to respond with calm and thoughtful guidance rather than harsh punishment.
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In this video, you'll learn that anger is not dangerous, but can be triggering due to past experiences, and that we need to teach children (and ourselves) how to feel and share anger safely, rather than shaming them for it, by helping them uncover and communicate the underlying need.
Learn how to shift the vibe of your home environment and improve your connection with your children by finding ways to say "yes" instead of always resorting to "no" in this insightful video on parental co-regulation and relational reactivity.
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