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It is so important for all of us to remember how complex our attachment relationships are.
We all have unique natures that set off unique dynamics with our caregivers.
Sibling gaslighting often comes from the false belief that you can know what your sibling experienced because you were in the same home.
But the reality is that each unique kid is treated differently in each unique family system.
So if you have a sibling who feels different about their childhood than you do about yours, that doesn't necessarily mean that they are ungrateful or wrong, or idealizing your parents....they just had a different childhood than you.
The difference between calm and gentle teaching and permissiveness when addressing problematic behavior in children can be confusing, but punishing a child for their mistakes does not teach them emotional and behavioral maturity; instead, being respectful and patient in drawing boundaries and limits is more effective in teaching children the right way to handle difficult situations.
Supporting a trauma survivor's felt safety means being present with empathy and patience, providing a space of safety to help calm their dysregulation and offer them a secure and grounding attachment relationship.
In this video, you'll learn how chronic anger and irritation could be a sign of unresolved trauma in your nervous system, and how processing those stories and finding safe spaces to feel grief and powerlessness can be the cure.