In generational trauma cycles, it usually takes multiple generations to get back to a secure way of relating.
We went from power and control dynamics to behavioral dynamics to connection dynamics.
Somewhere in an insecure lineage there was trauma and/or the intrusion of a colonial mindset (control over connection) that threw off your family from the human instinct to cultivate a secure attachment relationship between parent and child.
Your job as a parent is to do as much of the healing work that you can, trusting the next generation to keep it going.
My mom did some incredible cycle breaking. She protected me from an unbelievable load of harsh treatment. It gave me the capacity to keep the cycle breaking going. I am so thankful for that, even if she wasn't able to get us all the way to secure when I was a child, she laid the path for me to do it for my children. And then they can take that security and deepen the legacy of connection for their children.
Learn about the brain-based shift happening in teenagers and why they may seem less interested in their parents, but still rely on them, in this fascinating neuroscience study.
Learn why idealization can lead to grandiose pressure and the dangers of love bombing in this insightful video on building trust and secure attachment in relationships.
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Discover the truth about toughness culture and generational trauma as we explore how acknowledging pain and learning to feel it can be the first step towards healing in this eye-opening video.
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