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If empathy wasn't something you received in your attachment relationships growing up, it feels strange and awkward as an adult. Sometimes you might even confuse it with pity.
But you can't heal without empathy. Because what is broken in relationship needs to be fixed in the context of a relationship.
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
Learn how to navigate parenting with a partner who is not on the same page as you when it comes to attachment-focused parenting in this enlightening video that emphasizes the importance of starting with connection, collaboration, and modeling instead of trying to persuade or degrade your partner's way of doing things, and seeking support if your partner is abusive.