The heart of a person with an avoidant attachment style isn't "I don't want to be close"...it's "I don't want to burden you with my needs and emotions".
So if someone you love is avoidant, be faithful to show up in their small stuff and remind them how honored you feel to do so. They are so scared their needs will push you away so take time to show them that the opposite is actually true.
If you didn't have a secure attachment style in childhood, you're not alone. Here are three phases of healing you can work through to change your patterns of relating and build new, secure relationships.
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Learn how to deliver an ultimatum with kindness and honesty, and set healthy boundaries in your relationships, in this insightful video.
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In this video, relationship expert explains how the instinct to push away when wanting to be close is called "protest" behavior in attachment research, but in couples counseling, it is often referred to as sabotage, and shares the most effective way to bring your partner close is to express your desire for connection.
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