Many mothers (and fathers and other caregivers) aren't equipped to give their children secure attachment experiences. They only know to pass on the pattern of relating they received from their caregivers.
Acknowledging this reality doesn't dishonor your parents, or mean that you aren't grateful for all they tried to do for you if.
You can still accept the love they could give and give yourself permission to heal from the insecurity you also inherited from them.
When we let ourselves grieve our attachment wounds, we get to move forward and find more secure people and love in more secure ways, breaking the cycle for the next generation.
(For those of you who know your parents intended you harm, you may have had parents who were sociopathic and it is ok to not want to say "they did the best they could" in your process. Parents intending harm is not the same as trying to do you right but having no clue how ...I see you.)
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In this video, we learn how attachment experiences can affect the way we process trauma, with empathy and compassion being key to healing and preventing feelings of guilt, blame and shame that can linger long after an event has ended.
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In this video, you'll learn about self-gaslighting, which is learned from attachment relationships where someone taught you to constantly question your body, reactions, and views on reality, and the importance of acknowledging the trauma and learning to trust your own needs.
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In this video, you'll learn how our relationship with our children can reveal areas in our lives that need care, including past traumas and present issues, and how taking a pause to reflect on these triggers can lead to personal growth and healing.
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