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Because we identify with our attachment loves (kids, spouses, parents, best friends etc) we are more likely to treat them the same way we treat ourselves.
If you find it easier to be kind and generous with strangers or acquaintances, it is likely about your own lack of self compassion, not something with your loves.
Try being more gentle with yourself and watch what happens with your instincts towards the people who matter most.
Learn how to motivate your children without resorting to harshness and punishment by turning up the volume on playfulness and engaging your child's whole brain in this insightful video.
In this video, parenting expert discusses the reality of being patient and connected with your children, especially during challenging times, and the importance of repairing ruptures in your parent-child relationship to build a secure attachment.
In this video, relationship expert explains how the instinct to push away when wanting to be close is called "protest" behavior in attachment research, but in couples counseling, it is often referred to as sabotage, and shares the most effective way to bring your partner close is to express your desire for connection.