Learn about the importance of light up moments and why they work so well with kids.
I've been a family therapist for more than 15 years and have a good tip for all your parents.
I didn't learn it in grad school, and I didn't learn it in the clinic. I learned it from a dog.
You know, that thing they do when you come home, or when you walk into the room?
Do that same thing with your kids when they walk into the room.
Light Up.
When they see you light up, what happens inside of them is they feel delightful. And when we feel delightful, we feel worthy, and we feel confident, and we don't get stuck on as many of the parts of ourselves that are imperfect because we know we belong.
When they see us light up about being in their presence (not for their achievements or compliance or good behavior)...it gives their inside world a boost of confidence and it helps them sense the difference between safe people they belong with and the rejection or bullying that comes with toxic dynamics.
You have to do it when they're young because when they become teenagers, they turn into cats.
You can't be a dog anymore. Because you will scare the cat away.
I've been a family therapist for more than 15 years and have a good tip for all your parents.
I didn't learn it in grad school, and I didn't learn it in the clinic. I learned it from a dog.
You know, that thing they do when you come home, or when you walk into the room?
Do that same thing with your kids when they walk into the room.
Light Up.
When they see you light up, what happens inside of them is they feel delightful. And when we feel delightful, we feel worthy, and we feel confident, and we don't get stuck on as many of the parts of ourselves that are imperfect because we know we belong.
When they see us light up about being in their presence (not for their achievements or compliance or good behavior)...it gives their inside world a boost of confidence and it helps them sense the difference between safe people they belong with and the rejection or bullying that comes with toxic dynamics.
You have to do it when they're young because when they become teenagers, they turn into cats.
You can't be a dog anymore. Because you will scare the cat away.
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In this video, you'll learn that being an imperfect parent is not inadequate, and that the ability to repair conflicts and model compassion to your kids and yourself is what truly makes a great parent, so don't beat yourself up for being human.
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In this video, you'll learn that hovering over our kids to protect them is not the best form of protection, as they need us to be connected with them so they can come to us as a refuge, and that the best protection we can offer them is connection.
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In this video, you'll learn that a securely attached young child expresses their distress, seeks proximity to their caregiver, and calms quickly, and that this pattern of express-seek-soothe can be seen throughout our lifespan, with teens seeking friends, adults seeking romantic partners or close friends, but always involving the freedom to have an emotional need, be close, and receive comfort at every stage of life.
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