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Your kids are not reflections of you, but they sure will reflect back to you the things you haven't yet accepted about yourself.
If you find yourself deeply triggered about something about your kid, walk it back in your own story and ask yourself how did people respond to me in this similar part of my life? Or was I ever allowed to be this way? What would have been helpful for me to hear or feel from an adult in a moment like this?
The difference between consequences and punishment is important to understand, as consequences are the natural outcome of an action and necessary for learning, while punishments are intentional pain inflicted to control behavior, which can damage the parent-child relationship and hinder a child's growth towards internal security.
In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges of managing anger when recovering from a childhood where anger was out of control, but emphasizes that anger is a normal and necessary feeling, and our children need empathy and support to learn how to manage it, rather than being labeled as abusive. Additionally, the speaker suggests seeking care to separate past trauma responses from present situations for both yourself and your children's wellbeing.
Learn how to support your child when they feel jealous with these 3 essential steps - empathize, regulate, and guide - to help them understand and cope with this normal and complex emotion, in this insightful video.