1.
One of the hardest parts of cycle breaking is the pushback.
I get it too.
I want you to know what keeps me going in my connection focused parenting approach...in all of my years working with families I have NEVER seen a parent regret being compassionate and connected to their child.
The regrets I see parents process over and over have two themes in common: harsh response to their children, or disconnection from their children.
Hang in there, and return to the wisdom of kindness when you are being critiqued.
Teaching healthy conflict resolution to our children means modeling it for them, which requires communicating and connecting through conflict without fighting dirty or being violent.
The idea of toughening up your children to deal with the world only makes you their first bully, stripping them of their sense of belonging with you; treat your children with respect and connection so that they instinctively protect themselves from unkind and cruel treatment.
A message to all fathers: keep going with your efforts to connect with your children because they desperately need to see what a healthy, connected, caring male looks like, and it will create a secure attachment that fosters resilience.