When our attachment relationships (partners, kids, parents, "my person") involve someone who has lived through a trauma nightmare (or 20)...we need to know the difference between safety and FELT safety.
Trauma f's with a survivor's nervous system and makes it harder to feel safety even when safe.
This is where a secure loving attachment figure is key...you can lend your grounded nervous system to this person by being present to their fear and dysregulation with an empathetic and calm stance. Offer patience and compassion and as they ride whatever wave of panic they are surfing by being WITH them and not pressuring them to feel safe, but being a safe person for them to feel unsafe with.
Eventually your relationship will be a space of safety in a world that is trigger happy to your loved one.
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Learn the importance of letting go of small things in healthy relationships, and how to use the "F#ck it bucket" to differentiate between minor annoyances and larger relational patterns in this engaging and practical video.
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In this video, you'll learn that effectively reaching out to those we love when feeling disconnected requires us to take ownership of our own feelings, rather than assuming what they feel.
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In this video, discover how our brain's instinct to tell stories is not only adaptive but also beneficial for our mental health, as it helps us process and move on from complex experiences.
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