The myth that comforting your child will "spoil" them is not only emotionally harmful for kids, its application actually creates an altered brain state that leads to higher levels of stress and mental illness in adulthood.
Neuroscience imaging has been able to correlate early childhood neglect and trauma with an enlarged amygdala.(higher reactivity) As well it has correlated secure attachment relationships with a thicker neocortex (better executive functioning).
So when your child is emotionally flooded, no matter if it is over a significant loss or something small, giving them compassion, proximity and comfort will only help them develop a healthier brain function and won't spoil anything except maybe someone else's perception of your parenting.
And if the choice is between your child's brain and someone else's approval...it's not much of a choice really.
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In this video, learn about 4 different parenting mindsets - power and control, behavioral, permissive, and attachment - to help you make choices based on your parenting goals when faced with tricky situations.
Discover which of the 4 attachment styles, represented by different animals, resonates with you the most when dealing with emotional distress in this thought-provoking video.
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In this video, parenting expert shares insights on the challenges of breaking cycles, while encouraging parents to stay compassionate and connected with their children, as they have never regretted this approach, and harshness and disconnection are the most common regrets among parents.
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