When we say "use your words" during an emotional moment, we are trying to help our children come to a place of regulation. Unfortunately we are using a tool that they cannot access at that moment.
The reason they are not using their words, is because the language centers of the brain are being flooded with reactionary neurochemistry. Which means that hearing instructions via language isn't going to work either.
Instead, communicate with your non-verbal presence so that your child can FEEL your support to help their brain regain a sense of calm and connectedness.
After the emotional flooding has subsided and their thinking brain is above water again, they will be much more capable of using their words and helping you understand what was happening for them.
.webp){kind=avatar}
Learn how to set compassionate limits with your child in a way that benefits their brain development and reduces reactive responses to emotions, with the timing varying depending on factors such as age, hunger, and consistency.
.webp){kind=avatar}
This video offers guidance on how parents can help their kids learn about conflict resolution through setting boundaries and offering compassion towards both parties, emphasizing the importance of safety and boundaries, effective communication, and moving to repair in conflict situations.
.webp){kind=avatar}
Learn how acknowledging and releasing your meta feelings can help complete the stress cycle, as explained in this insightful video about the importance of emotional processing and attachment relationships.
%402x.svg){kind=icon}