If you find yourself entirely awkward and wanting to go into your shell when there are big emotions around, you likely grew up with an anxious avoidant attachment style.
Which is the fancy research term to describe family relationships where parents don't know what to do with emotions, so dismiss them, ignore them, and avoid them, teaching you to do the same.
The good news is this condition is not permanent. IF you put in some work to learn how to tolerate your own feelings and develop a skill for being present and grounded when feelings are surrounding, you'll find that life outside of the shell can lead to some really beautiful connected moments.
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In this video, relationship expert explains how the instinct to push away when wanting to be close is called "protest" behavior in attachment research, but in couples counseling, it is often referred to as sabotage, and shares the most effective way to bring your partner close is to express your desire for connection.
Learn how to break the cycle of generational trauma and cultivate a secure attachment relationship between you and your child by doing the healing work that you can, trusting the next generation to keep it going.
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Learn how to regulate your emotions and offer calm and compassionate support to your child when they are upset, even if you experienced childhood trauma or lack of emotional support from your parents, in this insightful video that emphasizes the importance of parking your inner child in a safe place, attending to their needs, and returning to being the parent your child needs.
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