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The term "boundary" can feel cold and disconnecting, which makes it hard for many of us to successfully ask for what we need in our close relationships, especially when that need is asking someone to stop a behavior or use a different tactic in relating to us.
But without healthy boundaries, resentment grows in our relationships, putting them at risk...
So think of boundaries as the strong links between two train cars that keep them together but safe from crashing into each other.
Boundaries are not about being distant from people, they are about being both connected and separate. They give us enough distance to remain true to ourselves, and keep our connection authentic in order to keep us tethered securely to each other.
Supporting a trauma survivor's felt safety means being present with empathy and patience, providing a space of safety to help calm their dysregulation and offer them a secure and grounding attachment relationship.
In this video, you'll learn about the challenges that couples face in their attachment when having children, and the importance of understanding and valuing the labor of the partner who cares for the children at home, as childcare is also work.
In this video, you'll learn that anger is not dangerous, but can be triggering due to past experiences, and that we need to teach children (and ourselves) how to feel and share anger safely, rather than shaming them for it, by helping them uncover and communicate the underlying need.