The term "boundary" can feel cold and disconnecting, which makes it hard for many of us to successfully ask for what we need in our close relationships, especially when that need is asking someone to stop a behavior or use a different tactic in relating to us.
But without healthy boundaries, resentment grows in our relationships, putting them at risk...
So think of boundaries as the strong links between two train cars that keep them together but safe from crashing into each other.
Boundaries are not about being distant from people, they are about being both connected and separate. They give us enough distance to remain true to ourselves, and keep our connection authentic in order to keep us tethered securely to each other.
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In this video, you'll learn that human beings are wired to co-regulate, and that words like "come here" or "I am here" used with gentleness and compassion can be deeply soothing and help our loved ones know that their emotional needs are not a burden to us.
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Discover how to build a closer relationship with someone who has an avoidant attachment style by understanding their fear of burdening others with their emotions and needs, and by showing up for them in small ways in this compassionate and insightful video.
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In this video, relationship expert explains how the instinct to push away when wanting to be close is called "protest" behavior in attachment research, but in couples counseling, it is often referred to as sabotage, and shares the most effective way to bring your partner close is to express your desire for connection.
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