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A huge component of a secure attachment relationship between parent and child is a parent's ability to accept who their child is. When we accept our children, we teach them to accept themselves which leads to a rich inner confidence and resilience in a world that will not always accept them.
There is nature (who your child is) and nurture (how your responses to who they are makes them feel about it)
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
In this video, Dr. Laura Markham shares practical tips on how to help kids and parents manage boredom by staying in a place of compassionate teaching, which involves expressing empathy, helping kids notice body sensations, developing the habit of seeing boredom as an unidentified need state, being patient, and teaching kids to discover their own options without collapsing into despair.
Learn how to set compassionate limits with your child in a way that benefits their brain development and reduces reactive responses to emotions, with the timing varying depending on factors such as age, hunger, and consistency.