1.

Why I am Not Trying to be a Good Parent

No items found.

Thank goodness that the attachment research is clear that our children do not need us to be perfect, or constantly attentive, or winning the parent of the year award. (Who can up with that idea anyway???)

They need us to be connection focused and capable of repairing when we get off the tracks.

Instead of laboring anxiously to be a good parent, secure attachment is formed from a parent's dedication to being a consistently responsive parent (specifically in times where our children are tender or in emotional distress).

Focus on the relationship between you and your littles and listening to their needs, soothing them when they are in pain, and delighting in them when you have the chance.

No need to beat yourself up for being grumpy sometimes or having a million distractions or not having their lunches cut into the shapes of their favorite cartoon characters.

You're not a bad parent. You're a person who is parenting in a complex world. And our instinct to bond to each other is strong and will weather many storms if we stay dedicated to returning to connection and care.

!7maZdGQE

Join the Attachment Nerd Herd

Complete access for $29

Similar to what you just watched

Managing Boredom
01:29

In this video, Dr. Laura Markham shares practical tips on how to help kids and parents manage boredom by staying in a place of compassionate teaching, which involves expressing empathy, helping kids notice body sensations, developing the habit of seeing boredom as an unidentified need state, being patient, and teaching kids to discover their own options without collapsing into despair.

View
Does Your Partner Have an Avoidant Attachment Pattern
00:46

Discover how to build a closer relationship with someone who has an avoidant attachment style by understanding their fear of burdening others with their emotions and needs, and by showing up for them in small ways in this compassionate and insightful video.

View
Viral Meltdowns
01:29

In this relatable and comforting video, parents are reminded to focus on minimizing damage and staying calm during meltdowns, even when they go viral, and to practice compassion towards themselves and others during these challenging times.

View