When kids are bored it triggers a stress response in their brains which activates their amygdala and deactivates the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for thinking and decision making. Which makes it impossible for them to take any of your good suggestions and put them to work.
They need you to hold your suggestions while you hold space for their emotional pain and discomfort so they can feel soothed and reconnect with their executive functioning skills Then they can pick something that will stimulate them in whatever way is right.
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In this video, Dr. Ramani explains how being devalued as a child can lead to over-idealizing your own children, ultimately making them ill-equipped to handle life's challenges, and suggests that adoring and guiding them with boundaries and limits is a healthier approach.
In this video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of attuning to children's inner world to build a secure attachment and suggests occasionally checking in with kids about their needs for love and affection, particularly during developmental leaps, to ensure that the love we give them is getting through in the way we intend it to.
The idea of toughening up your children to deal with the world only makes you their first bully, stripping them of their sense of belonging with you; treat your children with respect and connection so that they instinctively protect themselves from unkind and cruel treatment.
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