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Sometimes there isn't time to let the feelings all out. Our kids have big emotional resistance to things that need to happen right then.
Specifically I am asked this the most about toddlers and car seats. "What am I supposed to do when we have to get somewhere and my toddler isn't cooperating and all the connection tips aren't working to get them to leave willingly?"
I call this Compassionate Transportation.
I do it when my kid is lacking self control and someone else is getting hurt, or when they are near a road and not backing away quickly, or when I have to be at work and have no flexible window etc. I focus on keeping my body calm and empathetic while I put my child where they need to be.
It is painful. For both of us. But we repair and we process it later. And their trust in my capacity to handle their feelings isn't damaged.
When a child's brain chemistry is too flooded to cooperate but safety or urgent timing are at hand, you can hold a boundary without punishment, or shaming or harsh energy.
You care about what they are feeling while you compassionately transport their body to where it needs to be. Then they can let out all the feelings and you can repair and reconnect once the flood of neurochemicals settle.
Learn how to handle the endless "why" questions from your child by turning it into a time of imagination, allowing them to wonder and theorize about things, rather than just providing an answer, which can foster a sense of connection and curiosity.
In this video, learn why dismissing a child's emotions can hinder their ability to gain perspective, and how to help them process their feelings to build emotional resilience for bigger challenges later in life.
In this video, learn how to help your children calm down during moments of intense emotions by providing them with compassion and time.