Kids don't gain perspective by being told that they are overreacting. That is how kids learn whether or not their emotional state matters to others.
Kids learn perspective thru the process of being given the opportunity to feel their feelings.
As a child develops, they are able to feel in their bodies the difference between small and big grief which helps them to notice that some things are smaller than others in emotional terms.
When a child is crying over any disappointment, they need you to help them understand their pain and grief so that they can learn how to surf it. Dismissing it gives them no tools. AND it sends the message that their pain is not worthy of attention, which leaves them ill equipped when bigger grief comes later on in life.
When your kid feels grief over something "small", remember your job is to teach them how to feel their feelings and to show them that relationships are a safe place to feel them. The ability to process perspective will come as they grow.
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Learn how to regulate your emotions and offer calm and compassionate support to your child when they are upset, even if you experienced childhood trauma or lack of emotional support from your parents, in this insightful video that emphasizes the importance of parking your inner child in a safe place, attending to their needs, and returning to being the parent your child needs.
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The myth that comforting your child will "spoil" them is not only emotionally harmful but also creates an altered brain state that leads to higher levels of stress and mental illness in adulthood, giving them compassion and comfort will only help them develop a healthier brain function.
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In this video, learn why telling your child to "use their words" during an emotional moment may not be effective and how to communicate non-verbally to support them in regulating their emotions.
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