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Sometimes our children are so filled with adrenaline during a burst of emotion that it takes their neurochemistry a minute to reset. Their brain is triggered and they are not able yet to be calm enough to be comforted.
They need us to pause and stay calm and not take their reaction personally.
They WILL calm down if you give them compassion and time.
The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.
Learn how to handle the endless "why" questions from your child by turning it into a time of imagination, allowing them to wonder and theorize about things, rather than just providing an answer, which can foster a sense of connection and curiosity.
The difference between calm and gentle teaching and permissiveness when addressing problematic behavior in children can be confusing, but punishing a child for their mistakes does not teach them emotional and behavioral maturity; instead, being respectful and patient in drawing boundaries and limits is more effective in teaching children the right way to handle difficult situations.