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Your kids are not reflections of you, but they sure will reflect back to you the things you haven't yet accepted about yourself.
If you find yourself deeply triggered about something about your kid, walk it back in your own story and ask yourself how did people respond to me in this similar part of my life? Or was I ever allowed to be this way? What would have been helpful for me to hear or feel from an adult in a moment like this?
The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.
Learn how to support your child when they feel jealous with these 3 essential steps - empathize, regulate, and guide - to help them understand and cope with this normal and complex emotion, in this insightful video.
The idea of toughening up your children to deal with the world only makes you their first bully, stripping them of their sense of belonging with you; treat your children with respect and connection so that they instinctively protect themselves from unkind and cruel treatment.