Harsh punishment and power and control tactics like yelling, punishing, and shaming can create behavioral changes in children. They become compliant But WHY?
Because they are scared of the punisher.
They "work" because they trigger a dissociative shutdown and make a child unsafe enough to feel powerless and therefore to freeze or cease actions.
And what else do harsh punishments do to children?
They teach children that relationships are about power and control and to relate thru abusive patterns. Which leads to adults who are either 1. Repeating the cycle of power and control or 2. Have deep self worth wounds...both requiring lots of time and work to heal and change.
Instead of trying to control your child's behavior, work on keeping your own need for control in check. Be compassionate with them and with you.
Yes, set limits, but set them lovingly and without creating fear for them.
Discover how to support a child who has experienced sexual abuse with this overview guide. Learn essential steps, from providing empathy and encouragement to seeking professional help, ensuring their path to recovery is filled with love and support.
.webp){kind=avatar}
The difference between calm and gentle teaching and permissiveness when addressing problematic behavior in children can be confusing, but punishing a child for their mistakes does not teach them emotional and behavioral maturity; instead, being respectful and patient in drawing boundaries and limits is more effective in teaching children the right way to handle difficult situations.
.webp){kind=avatar}
In this video, parenting expert discusses the reality of being patient and connected with your children, especially during challenging times, and the importance of repairing ruptures in your parent-child relationship to build a secure attachment.
%402x.svg){kind=icon}