Nope. Toughing up your children to learn to deal with a rough world doesn't make them more resilient.
It just makes you their first bully. And strips them of a sense of secure belonging with you.
Human beings have survived and thrived as long as we have because we have an attachment instinct. When we form close supportive bonds with our family it helps us identify abuse in others and pick better friends and partners.
Treat your children with such profound respect and connection that they find unkind, dismissive, and cruel treatment jarring and instinctively protect themselves from it.
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Learn how to navigate parenting with a partner who is not on the same page as you when it comes to attachment-focused parenting in this enlightening video that emphasizes the importance of starting with connection, collaboration, and modeling instead of trying to persuade or degrade your partner's way of doing things, and seeking support if your partner is abusive.
As parents, we want to protect our children from harm, but threats of violence may not be the best way to do so. Instead, we can be a refuge and a barrier for our children, offering comfort and support in times of need.
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In this video, you'll learn that one of the most important skills we can give our children is the ability to apologize and repair in a relationship, primarily by watching what we model, with the two important elements being the absence of shame and the presence of true understanding of what the other person felt or experienced as a result of our actions or inactions.
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