1.

The Goal of Parenting

No items found.

Reminder that if we want our kids to be secure, well-regulated and resilient, we aren't trying to teach them to need nothing from anyone (independence ), we are trying to teach them how to effectively live in community and how to have close attachment relationships (interdependence). 

Human beings thrive when we are in positive supportive, mutual relationships. 

If your kids need your help (especially in big emotional moments), you are not creating dependence when you support them, you are creating trust. 

!7maZdGQE

Join the Attachment Nerd Herd

Complete access for $29

Similar to what you just watched

Please Don’t Say This to Your Children
01:17

Learn why teasing your children for struggling can be emotionally abusive and detrimental to your relationship, and how to do better as a parent by owning up to your mistakes and treating your kids with the kindness and respect they deserve.

View
The Two Words I use When Someone I care About is Dysregulated
01:00

In this video, you'll learn that human beings are wired to co-regulate, and that words like "come here" or "I am here" used with gentleness and compassion can be deeply soothing and help our loved ones know that their emotional needs are not a burden to us.

View
Staying Calm When Your Child is Not
01:19

Learn how to regulate your emotions and offer calm and compassionate support to your child when they are upset, even if you experienced childhood trauma or lack of emotional support from your parents, in this insightful video that emphasizes the importance of parking your inner child in a safe place, attending to their needs, and returning to being the parent your child needs.

View