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One of the most common questions I get asked about the level of emotional responsiveness and support I recommend parents to give to their children is:
"Won't that teach them that the world revolves around them?"
And while I understand the logic, it is not applicable in the context of attachment and child development.
The ways we relate to our children in their tender moments become relational templates they use in response to others.
Children who are given empathy when they are in emotional pain, learn about their emotions and develop the capacity to connect their body sensations to an understanding of what those sensations mean and what to do in response.
Then they can relate when other people are feeling and needing things and know how to offer care and empathy because it has been offered to them.
It increases empathy and resilience. Cool huh? You can be gentle and emotionally attentive with your kid and trust that your kindness is creating empathy skills and not a pattern of toxic self focus.
In this video, the speaker discusses teaching children to be socially capable while also recognizing and speaking out against abusive power dynamics, rejecting the notion that respect equals compliance and emphasizing the importance of paying attention and setting boundaries.
In this video, you'll learn about the myth of parental control, and how focusing on controlling our own behavior rather than our children's behavior can lead to a more secure attachment relationship and greater self-control in our children.
In this video, learn how to help your children build healthy relationships with their siblings by focusing on your own communication, being present, accepting all emotions, and using connection tools to model effective social skills without burdening your kids with pressure.