We want our kids to be able to take accountability for their actions but also be empowered enough to stand up for their needs and have boundaries with people who are bullying or mistreating them.
When someone is upset at them or with them, use it as an opportunity to teach them the difference between insults and feedback.
We want our kids to guard themselves from insults, but openly receive feedback.
Teaching them the difference will make all the difference.
Insults are aimed at their personhood (I don't like you)
Feedback is aimed at the behavior (I don't like what you did)
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In this video, the speaker discusses time outs from a perspective based on attachment research, emphasizing the importance of taking breaks to help reset our brains when we are dysregulated and the need for calm co-regulation rather than isolating with shame or pain as a lesson, adding that the lesson we want to teach is that our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can make good, safe choices - and this lesson applies to marriages as well!
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Learn the benefits of playing make believe with your kids, how it helps their brains and your bond with them, and get fun ideas for make believe scenarios to try, including playing wild animals on the way to lunch and defending a castle against stinky underwear, in this insightful video.
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In this video, you'll learn that human beings are wired to co-regulate, and that words like "come here" or "I am here" used with gentleness and compassion can be deeply soothing and help our loved ones know that their emotional needs are not a burden to us.
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