Lots of folks ask me about time outs...
My answer is based on attachment research (predictable me😂).
Taking breaks is hugely important to help our brains reset when we are dysregulated. So YES to the reset and break part of a time out.
But we're adding to their dysregulation if we are trying to teach them by isolating them with shame or pain as a lesson.
Our nervous systems do best when we have calm people lovingly helping us to reset. (co-regulation).
The lesson we want them to learn is "our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can calmly make good safe choices.
Works for marriages too!
The myth that comforting your child will "spoil" them is not only emotionally harmful but also creates an altered brain state that leads to higher levels of stress and mental illness in adulthood, giving them compassion and comfort will only help them develop a healthier brain function.
In this video, learn why dismissing a child's emotions can hinder their ability to gain perspective, and how to help them process their feelings to build emotional resilience for bigger challenges later in life.
In this video, learn three tips for navigating difficult moments in relationships, including acknowledging tension, expressing confidence in the relationship, and actively listening to the other person's perspective.