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Empathy is learned through RECEIVING empathy, and being surrounded by people who MODEL empathy, not thru being instructed to say "I'm sorry".
Here's how to guide a child when something they have done is hurtful to someone else.
1. Connect with them about the feelings that drove their behavioral choice
2. Model empathy for the person who was impacted by their actions
3. Collaborate with them to brainstorm repair and help them execute that repair
Rinse and Repeat. Hundreds of times.
The ability to be accountable for our actions and empathetic to the people who were negatively impacted is a highly complex emotional skill that takes time to learn. How many grown ups do you know that do it well? Most people were told to "say sorry" without any training on the complex process truly involved in taking accountability and making repairs.
Learn how to motivate your children without resorting to harshness and punishment by turning up the volume on playfulness and engaging your child's whole brain in this insightful video.
Learn why kindness is a learned behavior that requires empathy and space for development, especially for neurodivergent children, in this informative video that encourages viewers to seek evaluation if standard teaching methods are not effective.
Discover why natural consequences are great teachers for children, especially those with neurodivergent conditions like ADHD and Autism, and why guiding and teaching instead of punishing and preaching is a more effective approach to helping your child learn to listen to and trust their bodies, in this enlightening video on interoception and attachment.