Reminder: As parents, we can get into a "no" state that is affecting our kids ability to co-regulate with us. We might be overstimulated, exhausted, or just flooded with all the things that need our attention. So we restort to a relational reactivity of annoyance and intolerance to our children's requests.
While it may seem counterintuitive, sometimes you need to find a yes you can offer to reconnect with your children so that the whole vibe of the environment shifts.
You don't have to say yes to the things you really need to hold a boundary on (no child, you still cannot put your hand in the hot pan), but find a little give (would you like to rinse the noodles in the sink when they are done?) and watch the magic when you find another way to say yes.
When you pause and find a yes you're saying yes to connection, and co regulation and finding a moment to connect amidst the 17bagillion tasks we are juggling our way through.
.webp){kind=avatar}
The difference between calm and gentle teaching and permissiveness when addressing problematic behavior in children can be confusing, but punishing a child for their mistakes does not teach them emotional and behavioral maturity; instead, being respectful and patient in drawing boundaries and limits is more effective in teaching children the right way to handle difficult situations.
.webp){kind=avatar}
In this video, learn why it's important to focus on soothing and supporting kids' emotions before trying to teach them, as strong emotions take energy away from the brain's thinking and processing areas, and how you can use co-regulation and language to help them grow once they've calmed down. Remember to "Connect before you correct," as Dr. Karyn Purvis said.
.webp){kind=avatar}
In this video, you'll learn that hovering over our kids to protect them is not the best form of protection, as they need us to be connected with them so they can come to us as a refuge, and that the best protection we can offer them is connection.
%402x.svg){kind=icon}