Reminder: As parents, we can get into a "no" state that is affecting our kids ability to co-regulate with us. We might be overstimulated, exhausted, or just flooded with all the things that need our attention. So we restort to a relational reactivity of annoyance and intolerance to our children's requests.
While it may seem counterintuitive, sometimes you need to find a yes you can offer to reconnect with your children so that the whole vibe of the environment shifts.
You don't have to say yes to the things you really need to hold a boundary on (no child, you still cannot put your hand in the hot pan), but find a little give (would you like to rinse the noodles in the sink when they are done?) and watch the magic when you find another way to say yes.
When you pause and find a yes you're saying yes to connection, and co regulation and finding a moment to connect amidst the 17bagillion tasks we are juggling our way through.
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In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges of managing anger when recovering from a childhood where anger was out of control, but emphasizes that anger is a normal and necessary feeling, and our children need empathy and support to learn how to manage it, rather than being labeled as abusive. Additionally, the speaker suggests seeking care to separate past trauma responses from present situations for both yourself and your children's wellbeing.
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In this video, the speaker reflects on how our mental and emotional states can impact our decision-making, and emphasizes the importance of offering compassion and understanding to both ourselves and others, particularly in times of stress, anxiety, and transition.
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The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.
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