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We don't have to choose between being compassionate and setting a limit.
In fact, the more connected we remain to our child as we teach them, the better their brain will function for absorbing the lesson at hand instead of processing our reactive responses to their emotions.
FYI: How long it takes to set a compassionate limit varies depending on your child's age, how hungry or tired they are at that moment, what other stressors they are navigating in their life at the moment, and whether or not you have been consistent in your structure and limits.
As parents, we want to protect our children from harm, but threats of violence may not be the best way to do so. Instead, we can be a refuge and a barrier for our children, offering comfort and support in times of need.
In this video, the speaker discusses how our culture tends to attribute behaviors and motivations to people's private parts, and proposes the term "Overgenitalization" to help us understand that violence and nurture do not come from a person's reproductive body parts, but rather from the environments and social experiences they are raised in.
Learn about the concept of Restraint Collapse and how children rely on their attachment relationship to express their emotions in this insightful video, which provides tips on how to offer compassion and a safe space for your kids to release their emotional tensions after holding it together all day.