1.

One Reason Not to Use Punishment with Your Kids

No items found.

When we are asking our children to change their behavior or understand the impact of their behavior we are creating neural patterns for them.

If we use punishment we are creating shame, fear and pain connections to the experience of being asked to change or grow.

These neural networks then get activated in other relationships making it hard to be receptive to change or to feedback from people in our lives.

When we use teaching focused methods instead of control focused methods our children can learn without feeling yucky about growth.

Gentle teaching doesn't make weaker adults, it makes calmer more centered adults.

Check out "no drama discipline" by Dan Siegel , or peaceful parent happy kids by Dr  Laura Markum for ideas on how to teach without punishment

!7maZdGQE

Join the Attachment Nerd Herd

Complete access for $29

Similar to what you just watched

Is it Extroversion or a Preoccupied Attachment Pattern?
01:19

Learn about the two sources that drive the desire to always be around people, natural extraversion and trauma response, and how recognizing the latter can help you find rest in solitude and process past relationships in this insightful video.

View
Why We Feel Contempt towards our Partners When We Mess Up
01:00

Learn how contempt in relationships often stems from shame and how to address the root cause of contempt by addressing the underlying shame through vulnerability and open communication with your partner or attachment figures in this insightful and practical video.

View
How Do You Know if Your Child Has a Secure Attachment with You?
01:00

In this video, you'll learn that a securely attached young child expresses their distress, seeks proximity to their caregiver, and calms quickly, and that this pattern of express-seek-soothe can be seen throughout our lifespan, with teens seeking friends, adults seeking romantic partners or close friends, but always involving the freedom to have an emotional need, be close, and receive comfort at every stage of life.

View