When we want to be alone, it can come from different motivations. It can be an instinct to recharge (introversion) or an instinct to isolate in pain (avoidant/dismissive attachment style).
1. Honor introversion. Go get you some alone time and charge that battery!
2. Let go of the old avoidant pattern tho.. Heal the wounds beneath the insecure attachment response and learn to let people care for your pain with you.
The idea of toughening up your children to deal with the world only makes you their first bully, stripping them of their sense of belonging with you; treat your children with respect and connection so that they instinctively protect themselves from unkind and cruel treatment.
Supporting a trauma survivor's felt safety means being present with empathy and patience, providing a space of safety to help calm their dysregulation and offer them a secure and grounding attachment relationship.
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In this video, you'll learn about the challenges that couples face in their attachment when having children, and the importance of understanding and valuing the labor of the partner who cares for the children at home, as childcare is also work.
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