Lots of folks ask me about time outs...
My answer is based on attachment research (predictable me😂).
Taking breaks is hugely important to help our brains reset when we are dysregulated. So YES to the reset and break part of a time out.
But we're adding to their dysregulation if we are trying to teach them by isolating them with shame or pain as a lesson.
Our nervous systems do best when we have calm people lovingly helping us to reset. (co-regulation).
The lesson we want them to learn is "our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can calmly make good safe choices.
Works for marriages too!
In this video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of attuning to children's inner world to build a secure attachment and suggests occasionally checking in with kids about their needs for love and affection, particularly during developmental leaps, to ensure that the love we give them is getting through in the way we intend it to.
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The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.
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Learn how to support your kids through the emotional rollercoaster of going to school, especially on tough Mondays, by holding boundaries, offering comfort, and staying compassionate during the transition process.
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