1.

Instead of Punishing through Time Outs, Regulate through Taking a Break

No items found.

Lots of folks ask me about time outs...

My answer is based on attachment research (predictable mešŸ˜‚).

Taking breaks is hugely important to help our brains reset when we are dysregulated. So YES to the reset and break part of a time out.

But we're adding to their dysregulation if we are trying to teach them by isolating them with shame or pain as a lesson.

Our nervous systems do best when we have calm people lovingly helping us to reset. (co-regulation).

The lesson we want them to learn is "our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can calmly make good safe choices.

Works for marriages too!

ā€

!7maZdGQE

Join the Attachment Nerd Herd

Complete access for $29

Similar to what you just watched

Managing Separation Meltdowns
01:20

Find out why separation meltdowns in small children are completely normal and how separation rituals can help your child feel more secure and in control in this insightful video.

View
Why a Protective Parenting Stance is Less Protective than a Connection Focused Parenting Stance
00:59

In this video, you'll learn that hovering over our kids to protect them is not the best form of protection, as they need us to be connected with them so they can come to us as a refuge, and that the best protection we can offer them is connection.

View
How to Raise Confident Kids
00:48

Learn how attuning to a child's interests and internal states can build their trust in their body, freeing them to confidently explore the world in this insightful video.

View