One of the most important roles we play in our children's lives is the role of assisting with emotional regulation.
Because their brains are still developing they need to borrow our calmness and groundedness when they are emotionally flooded.
This is FAR easier said than done. Especially if you are highly sensitive or if you are an abuse survivor.
Remember these three things to help you stay calm and available to your kids:
1. It's not my job to make their feelings go away, it's my job to teach them about their feelings and how to feel them
2. What I felt BEFORE their meltdown is my body state, I can return to that and still care about their feelings (differentiation)
3. All feelings pass
Hang in there parents, the more you do this the easier it gets!!
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Parenting can be tough, but taking a minute to reflect on your long-term goals and imagining your kids as adults can help guide your decisions and strengthen your relationship with them - remember to be kind to yourself and hold onto the vision.
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In this video, the speaker discusses time outs from a perspective based on attachment research, emphasizing the importance of taking breaks to help reset our brains when we are dysregulated and the need for calm co-regulation rather than isolating with shame or pain as a lesson, adding that the lesson we want to teach is that our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can make good, safe choices - and this lesson applies to marriages as well!
In this video, the speaker advocates for preparing new mothers and birthing parents for the mental health journey that comes after giving birth, discussing mental health nuances and providing clarity and compassion for those going through this stage.
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