How Do You Know if Your Child Has a Secure Attachment with You?

A securely attached young child has these three responses in moments of distress...

1. They outwardly expresses their distress

2. They actively seek proximity to their primary caregiver (can be through eye contact or crawling/running to them)

3. They calm quickly (within a few minutes) and maintain contact with their caregiver during that time until soothed

This same pattern can be seen in developmental variations throughout our lifespan but with the same three ideas...1. Express 2. Seek 3. Soothe.

(Teens may seek their friends or peers and adults seek their romantic partners or close friends but secure attachment always involves the freedom to have an emotional need, be close, and receive comfort at every stage of life).

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