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If you find yourself entirely awkward and wanting to go into your shell when there are big emotions around, you likely grew up with an anxious avoidant attachment style.
Which is the fancy research term to describe family relationships where parents don't know what to do with emotions, so dismiss them, ignore them, and avoid them, teaching you to do the same.
The good news is this condition is not permanent. IF you put in some work to learn how to tolerate your own feelings and develop a skill for being present and grounded when feelings are surrounding, you'll find that life outside of the shell can lead to some really beautiful connected moments.
This video offers insightful perspective and tools for healing from inherited attachment wounds, acknowledging the realities of our caregivers' patterns while breaking the cycle for future generations
In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges of managing anger when recovering from a childhood where anger was out of control, but emphasizes that anger is a normal and necessary feeling, and our children need empathy and support to learn how to manage it, rather than being labeled as abusive. Additionally, the speaker suggests seeking care to separate past trauma responses from present situations for both yourself and your children's wellbeing.
Learn how to navigate parenting with a partner who is not on the same page as you when it comes to attachment-focused parenting in this enlightening video that emphasizes the importance of starting with connection, collaboration, and modeling instead of trying to persuade or degrade your partner's way of doing things, and seeking support if your partner is abusive.