1.
When our kids fall or appear to get hurt, our job is not to hover or to dismiss...it's to tune in to their reaction and then respond in kind...
If they are light and fluffy about it....great! You be too...
If they are scared? Comfort and reassure them....
If they are hurt physically or embarrassed (emotional pain), Comfort them and help them process those strong feelings.
Our kids need us to be attuned and wary of overreacting or under reacting.
In this video, Dr. Laura Markham shares practical tips on how to help kids and parents manage boredom by staying in a place of compassionate teaching, which involves expressing empathy, helping kids notice body sensations, developing the habit of seeing boredom as an unidentified need state, being patient, and teaching kids to discover their own options without collapsing into despair.
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
Learn how to set compassionate limits with your child in a way that benefits their brain development and reduces reactive responses to emotions, with the timing varying depending on factors such as age, hunger, and consistency.