Anger is not dangerous, and it needs empathy and space in our relationships.
But it can be triggering. ESP if we have experienced rage or violence in our journey.
We often treat children feeling anger as if they are behaving badly, but the feeling of anger is a valid and important feeling.
We need to teach our kids (and ourselves) how to feel anger and trust anger and share anger safely.
And when a small child hits when angry, they aren't being violent. They still lack the language to communicate effectively. YES, teach them, intervene and be clear that we use our words to communicate, but instead of shaming them for their anger, help them uncover it and listen to it and learn to communicate the underlying need.
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In this video, we explore why punishment may not be the best approach to parenting and how positive reinforcement can be a more effective and nurturing alternative
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Learn how contempt in relationships often stems from shame and how to address the root cause of contempt by addressing the underlying shame through vulnerability and open communication with your partner or attachment figures in this insightful and practical video.
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In this video, the speaker discusses time outs from a perspective based on attachment research, emphasizing the importance of taking breaks to help reset our brains when we are dysregulated and the need for calm co-regulation rather than isolating with shame or pain as a lesson, adding that the lesson we want to teach is that our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can make good, safe choices - and this lesson applies to marriages as well!
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