Anger is not dangerous, and it needs empathy and space in our relationships.
But it can be triggering. ESP if we have experienced rage or violence in our journey.
We often treat children feeling anger as if they are behaving badly, but the feeling of anger is a valid and important feeling.
We need to teach our kids (and ourselves) how to feel anger and trust anger and share anger safely.
And when a small child hits when angry, they aren't being violent. They still lack the language to communicate effectively. YES, teach them, intervene and be clear that we use our words to communicate, but instead of shaming them for their anger, help them uncover it and listen to it and learn to communicate the underlying need.
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In this video, the speaker shares how their mother broke the cycle of attachment trauma by letting go of guilt and control, leading to a loving and secure relationship that transcended generations of abuse.
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The difference between consequences and punishment is important to understand, as consequences are the natural outcome of an action and necessary for learning, while punishments are intentional pain inflicted to control behavior, which can damage the parent-child relationship and hinder a child's growth towards internal security.
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In this video, you'll learn that if you struggle with big emotions and tend to withdraw, you may have grown up with an anxious-avoidant attachment style, but that this can be worked on by learning to tolerate your own feelings and be present when emotions arise, leading to beautiful connected moments.
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