1.
I've been thinking about how hard it is when my clients and friends and family work towards sobriety or decreasing use of a substance.
It awful. Even though it is the path to greater health and stability and connection in relationships etc.
It's hard.
And I believe that is one of the underlying reasons that folks in the throes of addiction get so defensive and angry when we acknowledge with them our true levels of concern.
(Yes some folks with addictions also have relationally abusive mentalities and that drives the response too).
But most of the folks I know who have battled the addiction beast and come out the other end are kind hearted people who had a nightmare to walk thru before they could feel peace and be their true underlying sober self.
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Supporting a trauma survivor's felt safety means being present with empathy and patience, providing a space of safety to help calm their dysregulation and offer them a secure and grounding attachment relationship.
In this video, learn about the power of empathy when dealing with anger, but also be warned about the limits of empathy in the context of abusive mentalities, where anger is used to justify harmful behavior.