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One of the greatest challenges a couple goes thru in their attachment is the immense constant work that comes with having children.
I have been lucky enough to share a partnership where we both work some and both stay at home with the kids some. This has allowed us a deep understanding of what it feels like on each side.
But many of my clients have not had this privilege and have gotten stuck in some dangerous failures of understanding, especially around the idea that one partner "works" and the other "stays home".
Both people are working. Childcare is WORK.
Today I encourage everyone to reflect on the reality a partner laboring to care for children endures everyday, without being paid a single penny for their gargantuan efforts.
(Next message will be on behalf of the person who works outside of the home)
Learn how contempt in relationships often stems from shame and how to address the root cause of contempt by addressing the underlying shame through vulnerability and open communication with your partner or attachment figures in this insightful and practical video.
Discover how to differentiate between the instinct to recharge and the instinct to isolate in pain, and learn how to honor your introversion while also healing the wounds beneath an avoidant attachment response in this insightful video.
In this video, you'll learn that human beings are wired to co-regulate, and that words like "come here" or "I am here" used with gentleness and compassion can be deeply soothing and help our loved ones know that their emotional needs are not a burden to us.