My sweet mama did something amazing. She realized from her own attachment traumas, she could break the cycle.
One of the ways she did that was by breaking the cycle of guilt and control.
When she told me "you don't owe me anything" she was releasing me from generations of abuse.
And do you know what happens when you love someone with open arms and open hands? They feel loved. And they openly return that love to you.
When she had a memory emergency last year, absolutely 0% of me felt burdened. I held her hand and gently cared for her as she lay confused and disoriented in the hospital.
The attachment system doesn't need guilt. In fact, guilt gets in the way of true unfettered gratitude and generosity that comes from secure attachment.
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In this video, Dr. Ramani explains how being devalued as a child can lead to over-idealizing your own children, ultimately making them ill-equipped to handle life's challenges, and suggests that adoring and guiding them with boundaries and limits is a healthier approach.
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Learn why teasing your children for struggling can be emotionally abusive and detrimental to your relationship, and how to do better as a parent by owning up to your mistakes and treating your kids with the kindness and respect they deserve.
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In this video, you'll learn about the myth of parental control, and how focusing on controlling our own behavior rather than our children's behavior can lead to a more secure attachment relationship and greater self-control in our children.
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