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The myth of parental control is so prevalent in our culture and our mindsets it is a hard one to shake.
I struggle with its presence in my own mind daily.
But I know it's a myth. We are not in control of our children and if we relate through power and control, we do great harm to our children and our relationship with them.
But we are in control of how we respond to our children.
When we take our focus off controlling their behavior and onto how we respond with our behavior we can offer a far more secure attachment relationship for our children as they grow and mature into people who have greater neurological capacity for self control.
In this heartwarming video, a gate attendant at Denver International Airport demonstrates the incredible power of empathy and patience in de-escalating a tense situation during a 6.5 hour flight delay, highlighting how accepting and understanding a child's emotions (and an adult's) can prevent dangerous behavioral responses and soothe their nervous systems.
In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges of managing anger when recovering from a childhood where anger was out of control, but emphasizes that anger is a normal and necessary feeling, and our children need empathy and support to learn how to manage it, rather than being labeled as abusive. Additionally, the speaker suggests seeking care to separate past trauma responses from present situations for both yourself and your children's wellbeing.
Learn how to provide honest and appropriate answers to your kids' tough questions about adult struggles, without being dismissive or intrusive, by focusing on your child's needs and taking care of their heart in this insightful video.