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When small children hit, push, bite, scratch, kick, or punch, they are not doing it to harm or violate another child. They are doing it because they lack impulse control and their stress response makes it hard for them to verbally express themselves in moments of big emotion.
They REACT because they are still learning how to process and ACT in ways that are socially effective.
Which is why it is so important that we don't harshly REACT in response, and instead ACT in ways that model the type of calm and thoughtful responses we want our children to learn in stressful moments.
Guide: don't tan their hide.
Discover why responding attentively to your young children won't make them weak, self-centered and dependent adults, as research shows that emotional attunement and responsiveness from caregivers helps children feel safe and develop better awareness and focus in relationships, whereas ignoring their emotional needs leads to heightened fear states that make it hard for them to learn the nuances of relationships - check out the recommended studies to learn more and trust your instincts for care.
Learn how to help your child process their emotions and build a deeper connection with them by following these three simple tips, which can help switch their neurochemistry from panic or despair to safety and connection.
This video explains the reasons why young children may slam doors and offers tips on how to handle the situation with calmness, compassion, and understanding.